If your spouse just blindsided you with the words “we need to talk,” or worse, served you with divorce papers, you might be reeling from the turn of events. Divorce can indeed be a traumatizing experience in one’s life.
Right now, you may feel completely unmoored and unsure of your next move. Below are some tips to help you move through the trauma and into a better place.
Understand that marriages fail – not people
While you may have wittingly or unwittingly contributed to the circumstances surrounding the divorce, you are not responsible for your spouse’s actions. Don’t let divorce define or break you. Gather the strength to protect your best interests.
Keep the children foremost in all decisions
Children need the stability that their parents provide. Devise parenting time so the kids can see both parents regularly. When they are with you, be liberal with the hugs. Hugging a loved one increases the production of oxytocin and calms both people.
Don’t try to handle it alone
Now is the time to turn to family and friends for the support you need to navigate the divorce process. If you or the kids are finding it especially difficult to cope with these changes, don’t delay in seeking professional help. A few sessions with a children’s or family counselor could do wonders for their mental health.
Research your legal options
Every divorce is unique. What was right for your best friend or her sister may be totally wrong for you and your family. Being willing to explore all the custody options can lead to the best solution for all parties.